Video Testimonial : Ashley Ridge Church Testimonial
My Pastor Jenn Williams first posted this on her Word Press Blog some years ago:
“I was you”
I was you
You wouldn’t know it now
My brand has changed
What you see now is “The Church guy”
The “Christian guy”
It is hilarious to me, that when I meet you…
You think I am “one of them”
I used to sit in the back
Hoping no one would notice
Hoping no one would talk to me
It was safe back there
Before I ever prayed in a circle
I prayed my wife wouldn’t make me go
Make me go to church
Make me sit through “their stuff”
I was the “Agnostic guy”
I shined my adamantium, agnostic, armor with pride
I looked down upon people I now love so deeply
Felt sorry for their need for “magic solutions”
My old brand was just fine
Only it wasn’t fine at all
I was carrying way too much of “my stuff”
Like a poison that “stuff” leaked out
It was slowly killing me
It was hurting those around me
I thought I could do it all
I thought I needed no God
Slowly, they started to chip away at the armor
Nothing spectacular
They showed me their brand
Like a relentless jingle
Their openness, love and gentle prodding
Got stuck in my head
And before I knew it I wanted “it”
At first, I turned down many invitations
I fake smiled and shook hands with many folks
Mysteriously, at some point, I started to say yes
I said yes I will go try this, I will go do that
Yes, I will go learn something there
As I started to say yes, the brand only shined clearer
I started to see glimpses of a different way to be
Glimpses of a different me
All my stuff came crashing in on the old me
I asked that He take my stuff
I was so tired of carrying it
So tired of hurting and hurting others
I wanted to Love, unconditionally
The way I was loved
The way their brand taught me to love
The brand they were showing me was Jesus
It is now my brand and people see it
I still feel like an imposter some days
Some days maybe I am?
Most days, I am just grateful
Grateful that the jingle got stuck in my head
And Jesus changed my heart
(click the link below to see the full post as it originally appeared in my Pastor Jenn William’s blog- She is an inspiring leader, a talented writer, an even more amazing person. She, along with my family, helped inspire me to begin writing again)